'nines and 'quines

BFN

to those of you not familiar with infertility abbreviations, that means Big Fat Negative. as in pregnancy test.

boo

life goes on.....

bedrest over - back at work!

i am back at work today, catching up on being out for four days.  although i was able to keep up on e-mail so there were no surprises.  we have decided that apache is my protector.  he did not leave my side at ALL after we got home on friday and during the weekend and the next three days, he was pretty much wherever i was.  the.entire.time.  and then toad finally had it.  he said enough was enough and placed himself literally ON me...here is photographic evidence :-)

we have a king-sized bed...both toad (left) and apache (right) had to be on MY side of the bed.  there is an entire half of a king-sized bed that is empty to my left....

here apache is showing his modesty.  and level of comfort...

toad...had had enough of apache of hogging

...we spent an entire four hours sleeping like this one afternoon...my arm was numb when we woke up but oh my was it sweet :-)

and finally, yesterday when i graduated to the couch...if he wasn't ON the couch with me he was on the floor RIGHT next to my head...

 

and marlyn?  well, she was anywhere BUT where i was...unless she wanted out or it was time to eat!  she is very content to sleep in her bed in the family room or on the kitchen floor right by the air conditioning vent all day long!

we will know on august 27th what the results of this journey are...the same day that i will be at the university of michigan-flint for orientation for the MBA program that i am starting in september...yeah, i just can't sit still :-)

update: four!

i am laying in the back seat of our car while ed is driving home from our embryo transfer - we put back four since we chose to do a day 3 transfer instead of a day 5 transfer. call me weird but i feel better with them "with me" instead of in a lab petrie dish! so now I spend today, tomorrow and wednesday in bed and my pregnancy test on the 27th.....

i have a picture of them but can't figure out how to upload it from my phone on the mobile app so i'll post it when i get home and in bed :-)

******update******
(trying to post a picture but not sure if this is going to work or not!!!)

seven and support

i had my retrieval on friday!  they got 15 eggs, of which 10 were mature and, we were told saturday morning, 7 fertilized.  tomorrow morning (monday), my doctor will call me and let me know how they are doing, and whether we'll do a 3-day or 5-day transfer.  if we do 3-day transfer, then we will go in tomorrow as soon as we get the call and have the transfer done.  if it ends up being 5-day then we'll go in on wednesday morning.  i have spent the past two days pretty much in bed.  friday and most of yesterday i was very uncomfortable and was using darvocet every 6 hours.  i certainly got lots of sleep! 

this morning we went to church for the first time in months...ed explained to our pastor that i have had a really hard time being at church with all of the children around but am feeling better about it now since the ivf cycle has started.  i would wake up on sunday mornings and have panic attacks because i just couldn't face the thought of going and seeing all of the families and children.  our pastor is amazing.  he listened to ed, and when ed told him what was going on, he told us that there was another family going through the same thing and he would introduce us.  we met them after the service and both me and the wife hugged each other and cried together...they actually just found out they are pregnant through ivf and just heard the heartbeat.  we shared our stories and it was nice to know that we're not alone.  we exchanged phone numbers and it will be very nice to be there to support each other...

i'm excited to get the phone call from our doctor tomorrow!!!

trudging along - need motivation!

so please tell me that you also have weeks like this sometimes...this week, all i want to do is - um, NOTHING...the laundry needs to be done (and folded - so much of it is sitting on the futon in my office at home and not folded), the house needs to be dusted and vacummed and cleaned, there are errands i have been putting off for weeks, i haven't really paid bills in awhile (lots are just direct debited but there are some that i have to trigger a payment for) and i don't have the motivation to do ANY of it!  this weekend i did help mow the lawn and did some grocery shopping but other than that?  nada.  zilch.  zip.  nothing.  naps, however, well that's a different story, yes i am good at napping.  i can take a two hour nap without even being tired!  i think to AVOID doing any of the stuff i'm supposed to be doing!  i need motivation.  and i don't think i can buy it in a bottle....oy.

i started injections on saturday so retrieval will probably be early next week.  other than stabbing myself pretty bad with one of the needles last night, they have been uneventful and i've actually LOST weight since starting the injections instead of GAINING weight like they tell you will happen.  ok, so i have just completely jinxed myself and now will wake up tomorrow morning and will have gained 5 lbs!

nothing else much is going on...my mom was hospitalized a couple of weeks ago for 6 days but she is doing better now.  i had to call the paramedics when i got over to her house one monday afternoon (after my brother had emailed me and said she didn't sound good) and she was too weak to even walk around her condo with a walker (which she doesn't use usually - it was my dad's old walker).  i knew then that something was seriously wrong.  so she spent 6 days in troy beaumont getting treated for dehydration, high blood pressure episodes, exhaustion and a few other things...trying to keep HER motivated to get up and out and about though is about as easy as it is to get ME motivated to do anything!  HA! 

other than that, please tell me what you do to motivate to DO something...i need something to get me going!!!